Tuesday, April 20

Life is not an Ice Peach Tea

It is hard to keep a positive self image when it's the people who you trust are the one that keeps badgering and bringing you down. There's no use of self confidence at all. Insecurity is a way of life around here.

Monday, April 19

My Mantra

I got a pocket, got a pocket full of sunshine
I've got a love and I know that it's all mine
Do what you want, but you're never gonna break me,
Sticks and stones are never gonna shake me
- N. Bedingfield

Saturday, April 17

It's like pulling a plaster

I posted this question to HR;

Would you rather have someone who tell the truth (which you won't like and hurts like hell) to your face OR who say to you what you want to hear and did not actually mean it?

At that time, of course his anger had subside a bit and I was trying to comfort him in a critical manner (after the earlier *loveydovey* comforting episode) and I wouldn't say stuff like that when he was boiling with rage. Rage does not go well with logic. I know that from experience, mind you. I am also like that.

My point being, sometimes people tell you lies because you asked for it. Not directly but through your body language or through experience. Like any other boyfriend would know to always say the girlfriend is pretty whenever she ask it. like WHENEVER~

In other cases, (especially that involves many other people) the truth would just do. Hurtful but faster.

Of course I am going to be mad when someone told me, "Yes. I am interested to join the skit. But today I am too busy, maybe next practise I am going to show up," and he did not. Show up. EVER. Who would not?

While that person thought he was trying to tell me what I wanna hear, I don't want to hear that excuses of yours. I want the truth that you are not interested. I might hate you because you are so freaking selfish but you are not a hypocrite. (of course you are selfish. Excuses like I'm too busy or too many assignments does not count - I too have a lot of assignments and have more responsibility than you).

Here I was waiting for your arrival (and stopped searching for other candidates) and you never did show up. When asked, you said, "Of course. Of course. I am in!"

To that question earlier, HR said he wanted the truth. At least when he knows it (of course he gonna throw manly bitch fit first - He is capable of that, mind you) and then tries to find other alternatives rather than just hoping for something that is not coming.

painful yet fast

Tuesday, April 13

From the lecture hall

It is lame to try to focus students' attention by saying, "This is gonna come out in the exam".

So much of trying to make school based assessment.

We are exam oriented just because.

That kind of teacher's attitude just add more problems than solving any.

My head is filled with statistics, graphs and tables.

My husband said he needed more space,
so I locked him outside.

Friday, April 9

Yay! Finally cut my hair

HR and I couldn't help ourselves when we saw the Clash of the Titans tagline. C'mon!

"This year, the titans will clash". How original is that? It is lame, lame, lame.

How am I supposed to know despite the fact that the tagline is superlame, HR insisted that we watch the movie. He said we need to stay positive. Give this movie a chance to prove itself. It is supposed to be the-movie-of-year.

Shall I just go straight to my point...

  • I tot Perseus is Poseidon's son (The Lightning Thief). Now, he is Zeus son. Anak hasil rogol plak tuh. Whoever the father is, I really hope his mother does know the real father.
  • For a movie entitles Clash of the Titans, there are not many titans. or titans clashing. Not enough clashing to compensate the tagline.
  • The fighting scene is not really among the titans (the so-called-father-of-ZEUS-HADES-POSEIDON). So, nope. No clashing among the titans. Just between human, demi-god (anak luar nikah tu, Perseus) and some creatures.
  • 5 seconds of the ever scary Kraken. Itu pun senang je dihapuskan. Tak sempat nak takut. Dah jadi batu.
  • the usage of deus ex machina.
  • Boleh tak semua mati n tinggal anak hasil rogol Zeus je untuk selamatkan dunia.
  • Plus, I don't really think the hero face suits the Greek era. He just seems so modern.

Saturday, April 3

One hell of a long lesson

Last week was a pretty hectic week. Only slept for a few hours each night. A massive pile up of unfinished work.

Last Tuesday was my fourth anniversary with HR. Celebrated it low-key style. I mean, its like every other night dinner with me putting make up on (than took less than three minutes) and wearing something different. We ate at an affordable place, mind you.

We agreed to only celebrate it the next week (Maybe by then my eye bags are less visible). Since none of us have time to bought presents yet, we settle for no present. But I did give HR a pre-anniversary gift, a poster (with our picture on it designed by my friend).

He was surprised. By my gift. By my appearance. After all he was only wearing slippers with a black kemeja that I adored.

Being creative, he gave me a big box as a gift. Impromptu gift that he collected at the Carrefour afterward. He said,

'This is for you. In this box, there is something better than you.'

I opened the box and its empty.

p/s: Nothing is better than me.

moon so bright it light up the night

kalau bulan bisa berbicara
kalau bulan berani berkata
kalau bulan itu seindah disangka
kalau bulan boleh hentikan masa
takkan aku di sini tanpa lena.