i dun think i need to eloborate on this frightful and dreadful moment of my life

sweetheart

Meet Mr. Pisang.
My very own GREEN doggie.

He is adorable.
He never talks back.
He is cute.
He is hugable.

He is loyal.
He stays in the hole with me.
He is shy.

I know that I vowed to myself never to buy anymore soft toys. Coz I am no longer a kiddie. Plus, I have tons of them back at home. But, when I saw him in the Warehouse, he was screaming my name wanting to go home with me. And I couldn't resist him.

Next thing I know I am hugging him in my room.

I dont know if he is coming back with me to Malaysia or not. But I do hope he will.

p/s: I am amazed with people that can play boomerang. It so cool to be able to make that thing come back to you and catch it.

So, you think you love me?

I was listening to Death Cab of Cutie.
It is a band.
One of HR's favourite.
The song that I am listening to was What Sarah Said.
I am always triggered to listen to the song as the title is so intriguing.
The lyric touch me.
Like any other lyrics would.

"But I’m thinking of what Sarah said

That love is watching someone die..."

So, who is gonna watch me die?

maternal instinct

As I recall, since I've been in NZ, I haven't touch a baby once, as in there are no babies around to squeeze out their cuteness or just to hold. There are no one close enough to me with babies. My point here is, I miss babies. Not mine. Just babies, in general.

I used to hate babies when I was teenager. I admit they are adorable but I am not the type who would hold them and play peek-a-boo like any other girls that would just drop everything when encountered with babies.

There are many cute babies in NZ. They are super cuter as they have blonder hair and bluer or greener eyes compared to Malaysian babies. Still, I cant just simply touch 'em.

OK, that's is just an intro to my entry.

Being a mother is not easy. From the pregnancy to giving birth to breastfeeding to raising the child. This is just based on observation and not experience. But mothers go through this difficult and painful phases just for their child.

One of many mother's wishes is to see their child grow up healthily and they NEVER ever want to go through the process of burying their own child before them. No mother ever wish this for anyone.

All I am trying to say, it is painful to see your child going through pain and soreness and they would do everything in their power to prevent that. They would nag, nag and continue nagging just to remind you of the DO and DON'T in one's life.

That is just maternal instinct.

Christmas celebration

On the 22nd of December, John Hope, one of our lecturers held a mini-feast for us who are staying behind in Auckland. It was so delicious and super stomach filing. Plus, his son is so cute. Dont get me start about his house which I adore so so much. His garden at the back is connected to the Cornwall Park. How cool is that!

Sheryll took all of us to the Cornwall Park, which me, Min and Pkah didnt go because of yours truly attire is so not for trekking around the park.

They claimed that Sheryll tookthem to the highest peak of the park. Later, John went about the NZ's style of Christmas tradition . We played Christmas Cracker, which was fun. We wore crown and answered a few riddles. Oh, the best part of all, we ATE!!

the delicious salmon that Andrew smoked

the other yummy food

ahh ~ the dessert

"Merry Christmas"

from yours truly

Quote of the day

there are plenty of ways to die,
we need to figure out ways to live
(from the movie the brave one)

no more goodbyes

Just today, i sent my family to the airport. They are on going back to Malaysia after spending 24 days with me in New Zealand.

That's two goodbyes for my loved ones within 6 weeks. That's more than anyone can handle. It is tiring forcing tears to stop streaming down from my precious eyes.


Handling the emotion was never easy for me. Before I sent the rental car, I stopped at Foodtown buying lotsa comfort food and unnecessary stuff. That includes pastries, chocolates, magazines and milk. After that, went to JB Hifi, bought myself my favourite sitcom 'The Nanny' season 2.

Reached home, looking at the human-empty house, the tears starting to flow again. Ate laksa that mama cooked for me. Then, I saw the asam pedas and sambal ikan bilis that mama cooked also especially for me, the tears just flow as freely.

The only thing that I can think of at that time is to hurt my other body part so that my heart wont ache as much. At least I feel other pain. Not emotional pain. Stupid idea, I know. So the heart continue aching

sampaikan pesanan ini

tolong beritahu dia,
tentang bicara hati sepi,
sayang mungkin berhenti,
rindu takkan mucul lagi,
jika berterusan begini.

tolong beritahu dia,
jiwa ini tak teguh,
perasaan ini tak utuh,
bila-bila boleh roboh.

tolong beritahu dia,
tiada saksi tika janji,
sumpah yang tiada bukti,
terlerai jika tidak diawasi.

Quotes of the day

• Identical is not similar
• jiwang itu benda yang aku xbrapa nk paham (mard, 2008)
• 10% of man je xcheat (fatin, 2008)

I want to talk about books

There are just a few books that I love reading over and over again and never ever got bored by them. Books that will still make me laugh or cry even for the fifth or more time I read it. It's just simply too mesmerizing. This kinda books I would treasure and never let go.

It is always the storyline that touch my heart. Sometimes, a few lines of the books are enough to win my heart. There are times when I would even memorize the lines, if it's so sweet.

The books is just so sweet.

I even forced HR to read this book as I love it so much

There are, of course, books that people like and recommended to me that just do not appeal me at all. I never seems to like the books that others might think so sweet and great. I know we all have different definition of sweet and what we like.

cupcake comel

last nite, me and my two brothers make cupcakes. superdelicious. we play around decorating with the icing. (masing2 nak hias letak nama awek)

having them around is a blast. ada je lawak2 sengal. but the BESTest part is U R their sister and you can bullied them around by asking them to do lotsa stuff including carrying et moi shopping bag.

mom is sick a few days earlier. too cold even in summer. the boys run happily without any sweater on their back while my mom is dress like a winter altogether with a sarung tangan. ciyyan die.

oh, i have a busy day and night entertaining them.
and i love every second of it

menunggu

the other day when I was waiting for my family at the airport, i saw many reunion of family that was very sweet that I almost cry. oh, so touchy~

my family are here now but my mom is having flu. I am busy taking time around the ever famous Auckland city. I am so happy that they are here.

I hope it never ends